Marriage – Definitions / History / Statistics / Studies

MYTH: ‘My Future Spouse Will Complete Me’

Loneliness can be one of the most difficult things we as humans can experience. For many singles, the feeling of loneliness can be a motivating factor in finding the perfect spouse. However, finding the perfect spouse can drive a person to give up a healthy relationship for fear there is a better person out there. The desire to find the perfect spouse is understandable. When entering a lifelong covenant one must assess the overwhelming joy and the inevitable sacrifices marriage brings. For most people, this is the first life-long decision they have ever made. In relationships how often do we guard our hearts too closely when the need to surrender to an almighty, trustworthy God is necessary. Strive to learn the motivation of your restless heart. Take the anxieties and worries that plague you to a grace-filled God who provides rest, peace and hope. Evaluate your expectations. The reality is there is no perfect person on the planet. Marriages require us to be sacrificing, honest, and willing to serve. Your spouse may complement you, but he (or she) will never complete you. That is Christ’s job. Check out these three components to a successful marriage: 1. Character Assessing the character of another person allows you to understand if you value the same things. There will always be something to disagree on; however, having similar commitments and a cohesive worldview is important. 2. Chemistry Chemistry is easily assessed and helps in understanding that two people are attracted to one another. Contrary to what culture teaches us, chemistry isn’t just about physical attraction. There is also emotional attraction. Infatuation stems from...

Pediatricians: Abstinence on the Rise

Pediatricians: Abstinence on the Rise A new report from the Centers for Disease Control (CDC) reveals that nearly 60 percent of high school students today have never had sex – an increase of 28 percent since 1991 — http://www.cdc.gov/healthyyouth/data/yrbs/results.htm Factsheet: http://www.cdc.gov/healthyyouth/data/yrbs/pdf/2015/2015_us_pregnancy.pdf In a press statement about the report, the American College of Pediatricians says the news “demonstrates clearly that Sexual Risk Avoidance (SRA), or sexual abstinence, is a relevant message for youth and a goal they can achieve.” In addition, the College says the CDC’s report also shows that Comprehensive Sex Education (CSE) is “failing.” “Teens who do choose to engage in sexual activity are using less birth control; sexually transmitted infections (STIs) are on the rise, as is adolescent depression, sometimes referred to as the emotional STI,” the College notes. “Sexual abstinence is the only behavior choice that offers adolescents 100% protection against the triple epidemic of depression, STIs and teen pregnancy due to early sexual debut.” Planned Parenthood has long pushed for sex education in schools that includes information about abortion, birth control, and – more recently – “LGBTQ-inclusive sex ed.” The abortion business announced in December it’s working with militant LGBT groups such as the Gay, Lesbian, and Straight Education Network (GLSEN), the Human Rights Campaign, and the Sexuality Information and Education Council of the United States (SIECUS) to promote so-called “safe sex” among LGBTQ youth. The groups are jointly attacking “abstinence only” education in a new brief titled “A Call to Action: LGBTQ Youth Need Inclusive Sex Education,” which calls for a “safe and accepting space” for LGBTQ students in schools and the requirement of...

An Analysis of SCOTUS Obergefell v. Hodges Decision (June 2015)

On June 4, Ryan Bomberger of the Radiance Foundation called out LGBT rights leaders for their hypocritical support of abortion. In particular, he cited Lambda Legal’s statement that “reproductive freedom and LGBT rights have been inextricably linked both legally and politically. The ties between these rights are so strong that we really believe that a threat to one directly and profoundly impacts the other.” On June 26, the U.S. Supreme Court released its opinion in Obergefell v. Hodges, declaring state laws against same-sex marriage void. The majority opinion was written by Justice Kennedy, who is widely recognized to be the Court’s swing vote on abortion. Notably, he did not cite any abortion cases. However, he did cite contraception cases, which were expanded upon to invent a “right” to abortion in Roe v. Wade. This has some pro-life leaders worried that Obergefell could be a bad decision for the preborn. Since I am a lawyer, I share this summary for the benefit of pro-life legal advocates as well as the pro-life community at large. In my view, Obergefell is a mixed bag. It provides language the abortion industry can use. It also provides language the pro-life movement can use, and Justice Kennedy’s refusal to cite an abortion case is very encouraging. At the end of the day, though, Obergefell is unlikely to have a significant impact on abortion jurisprudence. Justice Kennedy’s opinion opens with a discussion of the history of marriage: From the beginning to their most recent age, the annals of human history reveal the transcendent importance of marriage. The lifelong union of a man and a woman always...

December – November 2010: Marriage / Cohabitation With Children

  FIND PAST HOMEPAGE TOPICS UNDER "CURRENT HEADLINES" IN THE LEFT MENU… NOTE: THIS PARTICULAR WEBPAGE HAS BEEN COMBINED WITH A PAGE LINKED TO THE HOMEPAGE – "Marriage / cohabitation With Children (updated 12/2010)". THIS PAGE WILL SOON BE DELETED.  MARRIAGE TRENDS NEW! Unmarried With Kids: A Shift In The Working Class NEW! Fragile Families: Not Easy, But Essential NEW! Marriage: Marginalized in the Middle NEW! 'Lightning Divorces' Strike China's 'Me Generation' NEW! Cohabitation Nation: Growing Trend Results in Declining Household Stability Cohabitation and Children Outside Marriage Linked to Higher Probability of Breakups: Aussie Study (2010) Cohabitation: A Trial Divorce Marriage: An Important Key to Avoiding Poverty…     Marriage Trends With the recently released PEW Study on America's views toward marriage and family, marriage has made headlines in national news over the past two weeks. One main finding in the study was that Americans still believe in marriage even though they are delaying getting married. The following articles discuss current marriage trends in America. How Marriage Is Changing The National Marriage Project's State of Our Unions report compares the health of marriages today with those of the 1970s. It finds a widening marriage gap between the working class and the college educated: Divorce. Divorce rates are up slightly (from 36 percent to 37 percent) among those with only a high school diploma, but have dropped (from 15 percent to 11 percent) for the college educated. Marital happiness. College-educated spouses are just as likely to say they are "very happy" in their marriages (69 percent), but the share among the high-school educated has dropped sharply (from 69 percent to...

One Million+ Spaniards Demonstrate for Marriage and Family

Mainstream Media Systematically Misreports Attendance Figures & Reuters/Associated Press deflate official figures 1-2 million people gathered in Madrid’s Colón Plaza and surrounding streets on December 30th to affirm the values of marriage and family, and to protest the socialist government’s attacks on the institution. [2Jan08, Matthew Cullinan Hoffman, Madrid,...

Marital Breakdown and Divorce Increases Rate of Depression

Experiencing the breakdown of a marriage leads to an increased risk of depression compared to staying with a spouse, a new study published by Statistics Canada has found. Based on data from the National Population Health Survey (NPHS), the study examined the connection between ending a marriage and subsequently experiencing depression. Men and women were both found to have a greater risk of developing depression during the two years following the end of a marriage or committed common-law relationship, compared with couples who remained together. Twelve (12) percent of people whose marriage ended suffered from depression in the following two years, compared to just 3 percent who stayed in the relationship. Men, however, were more at risk of experiencing depression following separation than were women. Men aged 20 to 64 who experienced divorce or separation were six (6) times more likely to report experiencing depression than were men who remained married, while women who had gone through a divorce or separation were 3.5 times more likely to experience depression than those who stayed with their partners. While other factors accompanying the end of a relationship may contribute to the experience of depression, such as economic difficulties or changes in the number of children living in the home, researchers found such changes were not enough to account for depression levels, which remained higher even after the other possible factors were taken into consideration. While a majority of people recovered from depression four years after the break-up, the study showed a significant minority continued to experience depression. Statcan study: http://www.statcan.ca/english/freepub/82-003-XIE/2006005/articles/marital/part10(Marital)_e.pdf [24May07, Gudrun Schultz, Ottawa,...

Companies & Universities Offering Same-Sex Benefits Despite Homosexual “Marriage” Ban

The Cincinnati Post reports that most of the region’s major employers offer the same benefits package to co-habiting homosexual partners as to legally married couples. While the federal government deliberates on a constitutional amendment prohibiting same-sex “marriage” and individual states are being turned into legal battlefields, businesses and service organizations across the country have been quietly rendering the struggle moot for years. The Post reports that Procter & Gamble, Health Alliance, Toyota and Cincinnati Children’s Hospital Medical Center, Ashland, Federated Department Stores, Delta Air Lines and E.W. Scripps all offer marriage or domestic partner benefits to employees. This is despite the fact that in 2004, Ohio passed one of the strongest prohibitions against equating in any way homosexual partnerings with true marriage. The law not only prohibits the state from recognizing as legitimate gay “marriages,” but forbids benefits for “domestic partners” for state employees, including cohabiting heterosexual couples. The legal ban in Ohio does not put a prohibition on such benefits in private companies. The ban likely does affect publicly funded universities, however. The Post reports that Ohio’s Miami University is being sued by Republican state Rep. Tom Brinkman of Cincinnati to halt its recently established domestic partner benefits policy. Lawmakers in Kentucky are considering legislation that would prohibit marriage or marriage-like employee benefits at public universities in response to the decision of University of Louisville to offer the same kind of benefits. The Post quotes the homosexual lobby organization, Human Rights Campaign, that says some 9,000 companies and 300 colleges and universities extend benefits to employees’ same-sex partners. Read related LifeSiteNews.com coverage: Ohio Passes Strongest Same-Sex ‘Marriage’ Ban...

Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals Dismisses Same-Sex ‘Marriage’ Case

“Same-sex advocates want same-sex marriage not to get married but to radically redefine marriage and upset the culture. Same-sex marriage would drastically alter our society and hurt children.”   In Smelt v. Orange County, the 9th Circuit Court of Appeals dismissed a challenge brought by same-sex marriage advocates. Liberty Counsel defended the case on behalf of Campaign for California Families, which was granted defendant-intervenor status. The case began when Arthur Smelt and Christopher Hammer filed a federal lawsuit against the Orange County Clerk seeking a same-sex marriage license and claiming that the California Marriage Laws and Federal Defense of Marriage Act (“DOMA”) violate their rights of Equal Protection, Due Process, Privacy and Freedom of Speech provisions under the United States Constitution. The Court abstained from ruling on the state law claims because the state law challenge is currently pending in the California state courts. The Court noted that marriage has always been of paramount importance to the state and the state has always regulated the institution. The Court therefore said it must give deference to the state. The Court then ruled that the same-sex plaintiffs lacked standing to challenge the federal DOMA. The Court ruled that no state has determined that they are married. “Were they to change their residence to Massachusetts, their situation might change,” the Court said. Since they have not been recognized as being married, they lacked standing to challenge the federal DOMA. Liberty Counsel President and General Counsel Mathew D. Staver stated, “The federal courts should defer to state courts and the state courts should defer to state legislatures. The people, not the courts, should...

Marriage & New Marriage Research (update 2/2014)

NEW! Want to Make Your Children Happy? NEW! Courage and the Challenge of Parenthood Married People Less Likely to Die from Preventable Accidents or Cancer — “The Social Side of Accidental Death” Understanding the Definition of Marriage: Professor Co-Authors Book on What the Implications of Redefining Marriage Could Be on Families, Society Dinner Can Change Your Youth’s Life Being Fatherless Leaves Child Susceptible to Abusive Treatment From Father-Figure Spice Up Your Family Time And Reduce Your Risk of Developing Alzheimer's Marriage & Family Resources Unrealistic Expectations: 3 Things I Wish I Had Known Before We Got Married The Importance of Dads Resource: Institute for Marriage and Public Policy Study Ties Cervical and Testicular Cancers to Increased Divorce Rate Lack of Marriage & Work Are the Roots of Child Poverty Problem Marriage and the Public Good: Ten Principles How Can America Reduce Violent Crime and Gang Activity? Encourage Marriage Americans Love Marriage Research Continues to Uphold the Value of Marriage – Why Marriage Matters   For more information regarding Marriage and Cohabitation, click here.   Want to Make Your Children Happy? Evidence suggests that happiness can become a learned trait. Making your children “happy” may be as easy as teaching them how to produce their own happiness. According to Christine Carter, PhD, ‘Happiness is much better thought of as a skill or a set of skills that we need to learn and practice.’ For instance, having an attitude of gratitude goes a long way toward helping you feel happy. Gratitude can become a legacy; teach your children how to be grateful and not take blessings for granted, and you’ve just...

Cohabitation & Infidelity

A study published in the Journal of Marriage and the Family from the Univ of CA at Irvine reports that cohabitation has little effect on a couple’s expectations of their partner’s fidelity (94% expect sexual exclusivity compared to 99% of married couples); but that cohabitation markedly effects the likelihood that they themselves will remain true. “The odds of recent infidelity were more than twice as high for cohabitors than for married persons”, the researchers calculated. They also found that couples who have been “living together before marriage raised the net odds of marital infidelity by 39%“. [The Family in America, 7/00; J.Treas & D Giesen, “Sexual Infidelity Among Married and Cohabiting Americans,” Journal of Marriage and the Family 62, 2000:48-60;Abstinence Network, Fall...

Cohabitation: The Pursuit of Happiness

Happiness will fill the air as each wedding approaches. But there is also a note of sadness here. By the time couples ask a priest, minister, or rabbi for marriage preparation, about 3  of 4 couples have been living together. When asked, “Why are you living together?” the most frequent answers are: “Because we love each other and want to be together…We want to get to know each other before we get married, and liveing together is the best way to get to know soneone…We want to make sure that our marriage will last.” On the face of it, cohabitation might appear to be a good way to prepare for marriage if it would lower the divorce rate, and especially if the stated reasons for doing so were valid. But the contrary is the reality. The sociology Department of both Duke University and Michigan University interviewed 30,000 couples who married after living together. The sociologists found that 80% of the marriages arising from cohabitation ended in divorce. Would an 80% failure rate indicate that a cohabiting couple actually does not get to know each other very well? Living together offers little or no guarantee of a happy, successful marriage. Why doesn’t living together achieve the hoped for objectives? The net result of all these interviews boils down to one common element: In essence, the couples interviewed stated that the cohabiting relationship was a dishonest relationship. Dishonest in the sense that, while living together before getting married, the couple was incapable of being honest with themselves or with one another about their relationship and their feelings. Love and lust were...

Cohabitation vs. Marriage

  COHABITATION  vs.  MARRIAGE      The NATIONAL MARRIAGE PROJECT provides the latest and most reliable data available to marriage, divorce, cohabitation, fragile families with children, and youth attitudes about marriage and family. They have two updated reports: "Should We Live Together? What Young Adults Need to Know About Cohabitation Before Marriage" and "The State of Our Unions: 2002"; 732.932.2722.       The NATIONAL MARRIAGE PROJECT provides the latest and most reliable data available to marriage, divorce, cohabitation, fragile families with children, and youth attitudes about marriage and family. They have two updated reports: "Should We Live Together? What Young Adults Need to Know About Cohabitation Before Marriage" and "The State of Our Unions: 2002"; 732.932.2722.                 http://marriage.rutgers.edu         [email protected] 26 RESEARCH FINDINGS Finding #1.   Those who are sexually active before marriage have greater behavioral problems. According to a study reported in Pediatrics, early sexual activity leads to serious behavioral problems. Of 1500 girls studied, non-virgin girls were 2.5 times more likely to have used alcohol than virgins, 6.2 times more likely to have smoked marijuana, and 4.3 times more likely to have attempted suicide. Boys were seven times more likely to have been arrested or picked up by police. Those living together often do so to "prove" their love to their partner. Finding #2.   Those who live together before marriage abuse each other more often and more severely than dating couples or married couples. Numerous studies have found that physical attacks are clearly much more common and more severe among live-in couples than among those who are married (e.g., Scott 1994:79; Jackson 1996 and others below). The U.S. Justice Dept. found that women...

Cohabiting & the Effects on Children (updated)

About 2.9 million children under age 18 live with a parent & his/her unmarried partner. About 41% of opposite-sex live-togethers have children younger than 18 in their homes. That means about 4% of US children live in cohabiting “families”. [US Census Bureau Population Survey, 3/02; USA Today, 18Sept03] Cohabiting Stats from late 1990s: The number of cohabiting couples has increased from just over half a million in 1970 to 4.2 million in 1998, and that over 50% of marriages today are preceded by cohabitation. A recent study by pollster John Zogby found that general acceptance of the practice is increasing, with 56% of Americans thinking it is acceptable for an engaged couple prior to marriage. Nearly 60% of teens agree or mostly agree that it is a good idea for an engaged couple to live together before marrying, in order to “find out whether they really get along.” However, living together prior to marriage increases the chance for divorce later, and the practice produces many other negative effects: **cohabitants report higher levels of alcohol problems than married people; **aggression is twice as common among cohabitants; **there is greater marital instability and lower marital satisfaction and poorer communication during marriage following cohabitation;**depression rates among cohabiting couples are over three times the depression rates among married couples;**cohabitants report more frequent disagreements, more fights and violence, and lower levels of fairness in and happiness with their relationships than do married people. The effects of the practice on children is also detrimental. Children living with biological parents who are unmarried are 20 times more likely to be abused, and children whose mother is...