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Quotes to Note |
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Dr. Leo Alexander, Chief U.S. Medical Consultant at the Nuremberg War Crimes Trials confirmed that...
"Whatever proportions these crimes finally assumed, it became evident to all who investigated them that they had started from small beginnings.
"The beginnings at first were merely a subtle shift in emphasis in the basic attitude of physicians. The infinitely small wedge-in lever from which this entire trend of mind received its impetus, was the attitude toward the non-rehabilitable sick."
Once the physician or professor murdered his first innocent patient, Alexander declared, he entered the ranks of the criminal class and was bonded by blood cement to the ruling party.
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Giving Voice to the Fathers: Fathers are Silent No More (Nov07) |
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http://www.lifeissues.org/connector/2008/Feb08_GivingVoiceToFathers.htm
GIVING VOICE TO THE FATHERS
By Bradley Mattes, MBS
The event was publicized as a first of its kind and made news across the nation. It inflamed pro-abortion activists and has been billed by the media as a “new” concept in the debate over abortion.
Pro-life leaders, counselors, clergy and other interested individuals gathered in San Francisco, California for a history-making event. It was the first ever conference examining the issue of men and abortion. The gathering, called Reclaiming Fatherhood: A Multifaceted Examination of Men Dealing With Abortion.
Never before has such an impressive list of speakers and experts congregated for the sole purpose of assisting the fathers of aborted babies — dads who will never be able to hold their babies or some day teach them the fine art of hitting a baseball. These may be men who supported the decision to abort their offspring, opposed the abortion with every fiber of their being, or were never even aware of the pregnancy until after their unborn baby had died in the abortion mill.
Vicki Thorn, the Executive Director and founder of the National Office of Post-Abortion Reconciliation and Healing, organized the conference. Vicki has a long history of providing hope and healing to women who have chosen abortion. She has also become involved with reaching men.
The event was co-sponsored by the
Knights of Columbus and the Archdiocese of San Francisco. Funding for
the conference was secured just months before the gathering. The fact
that Vicki and her staff were able to assemble such an impressive
faculty was a testimony to their diligent efforts and the dedication of
the speakers. Attendees came from throughout the nation, as well as
various other countries. The excellent level of participation
underscored the need for such an event.
Perhaps the most poignant part of the conference was at the beginning
when a few fathers briefly shared their stories of pain and grieving.
During this time, the only sound in the cavernous room was the words of
each father’s testimony and tributes to their unborn children lost to
abortion.
With four abortions in his past, and immediately after finding out his
wife was pregnant, Mark Morrow confessed, “I suddenly realized that I
had four dead children. I hadn’t given it a thought. Now it all came
crashing down on me — look what you’ve done.”
Another father, Jason Baier, spoke of the visual image he had of his
child — a boy with blond hair, green eyes, chubby cheeks and a sweet
smile. Jason found out about the abortion afterward from his fiancé’s
sister. He said, “I couldn’t get the thought out of my head about what
I had lost.” At first, Jason struggled with emotions he didn’t
understand. “How can I miss something I never even held?”
The list of presenters was a who’s who of experts in the field of men and abortion. Some of the speakers included:
Vincent M. Rue, Ph.D. who, as a practicing psychotherapist,
provided the first clinical evidence of post-abortion trauma and has
testified before Congress. Dr. Rue and Dr. Coyle reviewed the limited
research on the effects of abortion on men. In an additional
presentation entitled, Trauma and Abortion: When Men Hollow, Vince
eloquently spoke to a post-abortive father’s pain and suffering.
Catherine T. Colye, RN, MSN, Ph.D. has developed a healing program
for men who have been affected by abortion. She is also the author of
the book, Men and Abortion: A Path to Healing, which has become a
valuable tool for those who counsel men. Her presentation called
Forgiveness Therapy with Post-Abortion Men highlighted proven
counseling techniques for an often-thorny aspect of healing for men.
Tom Golden, LCSW teaches mental health professionals around the
world about the unique male path to healing from stress, grief and
trauma. He authored the book, Swallowed by a Snake: The Gift of the
Masculine Side of Healing. Tom explained the unique methods of
effective male grief counseling and how they differ from women. His
gentle demeanor, peppered with humor, was a popular part of the
conference.
Warren L. Williams, MBA is one of the nation’s most experienced
counselors of grieving fathers. He authored a manual to teach others
how to counsel post-abortive fathers called, Fatherhood Lost, and has
written a companion Bible study for men, Missing Arrows — both
available at no cost through Life Issues Institute. Warren shared his
knowledge with helping men face their abortion experience and enabling
them to ultimately move on.
Gregory Hasek, MA/MFT, LPC is a licensed marriage and family
therapist and a professor at George Fox University. Greg, who counsels
men for sex addiction, said it is often linked to a past abortion
experience. His presentation, Medicating the Pain of Lost Fatherhood,
explained how men frequently seek relief from the pain of abortion in
all the wrong places.
These speakers, as well as others at the conference, share a passion
for helping fathers who have lost children to abortion. They understand
the human toll these men, and society as a whole, are paying for
abortion-on-demand. Attendees undoubtedly left with an increased
knowledge and zeal to minister to men.
The conference has aroused the curiosity of the media and ignited an
expected angry outcry from feminists and the abortion industry. The
first day, a local San Francisco TV station covered the event and
interviewed various speakers and attendees. We held our collective
breath, wondering how this outreach to men would be portrayed to people
throughout the city. To everyone’s pleasant surprise, the coverage was
relatively positive and fair. Since then, many newspaper and Internet
websites have given the conference attention. A recent addition to the
list was the Los Angeles Times with a January 8 article entitled,
Changing Abortion’s Pronoun, which has generated considerable awareness
and discussion.
Not all the responses to the conference have been affirming. Many of
the bloggers representing the views of hard-core, pro-abortion
sentiment spewed hatred and obscenity-laden vitriol, far too
inappropriate to replicate here. It’s possible that many who expressed
rage and anger are in their own minds desperately seeking to defend a
prior abortion decision. If and when the emotional wall of denial
crumbles, we will be there to help them pick up the pieces of their
lives.
It’s not a surprise that the LA Times article referred to the plight of
grieving fathers as “a new voice…emerging in the abortion debate.” Most
of the public has never even considered the fact that a father of an
aborted baby might suffer negative psychological effects. For that
matter, a good percentage of the pro-life movement has yet to
experience this revelation.
However in reality, work in the field of men and abortion has been
ongoing for some time. In the June 1996 issue of Life Issues Connector
I wrote about the reasons for post-abortion stress in men and its
common symptoms. In addition, the article conveyed some practical
guidelines for counseling these hurting fathers. At the time, awareness
regarding this issue was nearly non-existent.
Life Issues Institute’s decision to explore this growing crisis was
precipitated by contact from several post-abortive men over a period of
months, who poured out their heart and soul in letters and emails. It
occurred to Dr. Willke and myself that we had been missing a very
important victim of the abortion process.
During early anecdotal research, I crossed paths with some of the true
pioneers of those working to help men cope with the loss of a child
through abortion. Several of them seemed to be operating as islands of
hope, loosely networked to others of the same passion. There are two
individuals who deserve much credit for helping to establish a
foundation on which to build awareness and assistance to fathers after
abortion.
Rev. Wayne Brauning wrote his doctoral thesis called Men and Abortion a
Search for Understanding and Recovery. It was later published as the
first guidebook on the topic and set the bar for a thoughtful and
professional approach to answers and action. Wayne also established
MARC Ministries (Men’s Abortion ReCovery) and published additional
informational and counseling materials.
Warren Williams was also an early pioneer who has honed his counseling
skills and techniques over the years and now shares them in printed
publications. Warren founded Fathers & Brothers Ministries,
International to help men overcome the losses of fatherhood. More
information on both these individuals and others is available at our
website, www.lifeissues.org.
Life Issues Institute began a concerted effort to create awareness,
both within the pro-life movement and the public at large, to the
plight of these hurting fathers. With the considerable help of others,
these efforts have begun to bear fruit. Most crisis pregnancy centers
now acknowledge post-abortion stress in men, and many have incorporated
outreach efforts to them. Another new development has been the Men and
Abortion Network (MAN). It is a group of national leaders and experts
on the issue of men and abortion. Our goal is to create additional
awareness and to connect more men with the help they need. Several of
the conference speakers are members of MAN, which is an excellent
source of experts to speak on the issue in your community.
More information on MAN and other resources available to assist
grieving fathers is available on our website at www.lifeissues.org. In
addition, Life Issues Institute has a nationwide referral network,
which will connect men with counselors in their local area. In almost
all cases the help is free. While there you can be directed to other
organizations and individuals who also offer resources.
The LA Times article, Changing Abortion’s Pronoun, had a creatively
provocative title. However, a more accurate reality is that we aren’t
so much changing a pronoun, but adding one to the abortion equation.
Fathers are an undeniable part of the picture. Growing widespread
attention to the daily struggle of post-abortive fathers is long
overdue. And hopefully the attention generated by this first of its
kind national conference will produce a sequel.
[Life Issues Connector, February 2008]
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Abortion 
