You are VERY IMPORTANT!
Even though your tweens and teens may ACT as if they aren’t listening, you can rest assured they are.
Our times are very confusing, and teens are searching for help. In survey after survey, they respond that they want to talk to parents first.
THEY ARE WAITING FOR YOU TO TALK TO THEM!
And please be clear!
Give them the truth — abstinence until marriage will protect them from bushels and pecks of physical and emotional damage.
Even if you were sexually experienced as a teen, you don’t want all those problems for your own children!
So tell them!
Remember, a hypocrite is one who says one thing and continues to do something else, whereas a wise person is one who did something in the past, learned from that mistake, and now tries to help others avoid that pitfall.
If you love your children a bushel and a peck, tell them so!
Talk to them, encourage them to abstain from nonmarital sex, drugs, alcohol, and cigarettes because that is what is BEST FOR THEM — for their present and for their future!
If you find they have already experienced sexual activity, lovingly encourage them to stop and become secondary virgins, in order to protect their physical and emotional health from this point forward.
“Parental supervision of early dating was an extremely important predictor of teenage pregnancy rates of teenage pregnancy were reduced when parents supervised who the adolescent dated, where the adolescent went on dates, and the arrival time back home. Thus, the influence of parents is an important component in the complex set of factors affecting teenagers childbearing behavior.” [Hogan and Kitagawa, “The impact of social status, family structure, and neighborhood on the fertility of black adolescents”, American Journal of Sociology 70: 825-855, 1985]
“Parents and families influence the choices that adolescent children make about their own sexual behavior. Parents and families whose adolescent children feel connected to them and who disapprove of their teens being sexually active provide some protection from early sexual intercourse. Disapproval of adolescent contraception protects teens from early sexual activity as well as from pregnancy. Parents who give clear messages about delaying sex have children who are less likely to have early intercourse. More shared activities with parents also protects against pregnancy.” “Parents are making a difference in the lives of their adolescent children: by being home at key points of the day, by conveying high expectations for school success and behavior, by restrictng access to alcohol, cigarettes, and drugs, and more than anything else, by instilling in their children a sense of belonging.” [“Reducing the Risk: Connections That Make a Difference in the Lives of Youth”, monograph prepared by Blum & Rinehart, University of MN, based on Add Health data, “Protecting adolescents from harm: Findings from the National Longitudinal Study on Adolescent Health”, published in JAMA (10 Sept 97), by M. Resnick et al]
“Teens of today have spoken. An overwhelming majority want to remain abstinent and need the encouragement of their parents and society to reach that goal.” [The Indianapolis Star 5 May 2000 reported findings from National Campaign to Prevent Teen Pregnancy; from 6/2000 CPR News]
Almost two-thirds of teenagers who have had sexual intercourse regret not waiting, according to a poll released by the National Campaign to Prevent Teen Pregnancy.
Individually, 55% of boys and 72% of girls surveyed said they wish they had waited longer to have sex. “This poll is just the latest evidence that many teens are taking a more cautious attitude toward having sex,” Sally Sachar, deputy director of the campaign, said.
Thirty-seven percent of teens cited their parents as the people who are the most influential in their decisions about sex, with 30% citing that friends, 11% naming the media and an additional 11% identifying their religious communities as their strongest influence.
Sachar said of the results, “It … makes clear that parents can and must — play an active and continuing role in helping their children understand that sex can wait.” [From the Kaiser Daily Reproductive Report, 6/30/00]
Where can I find abstinence-only resources?