Talking With Your Children About Your Abortion, Part II

Why Some Parents Choose to Tell Parents cite a number of reasons for choosing to talk with their children about a past abortion. These include: (1) If the abortion is publicly known because the mother and/or father have shared their testimony in public settings, or feel called to begin speaking out about their experience; or if there is another reason to believe that the child may find out about the abortion from another source. “No one has the right to know about an abortion before family members,” said Bonopartis, who waited to speak publicly about her abortion until her two sons felt comfortable with her doing so. “I believe family members have a right to their time of grief and working it out. They also have a right to give their input–including the children–as to whether they are comfortable having the post-abortive person speak publicly about their experience.” (2) If the parents suspect that their children are aware or have guessed that an abortion took place in the family (for example, if the children were born before the abortion and may have guessed that the mother was pregnant). Cecilia Brown, who had an abortion at 18, had planned to tell her daughter about her abortion herself someday. Instead, she was dismayed to learn that someone who was angry at Cecilia had already told her daughter. “When my daughter found out I don’t know, but I do know that she dwelled on it for a while,” Brown said. “Then she got mad at me one day and started to blurt out angry words. I waited until she calmed down and...